....

the band can fix your body but it sure as hell cant fix your head ... ugh

dammit... full disclosure...

i have no fucking clue what is going on with me.

eating like a fucking pig ... my restriction is so fucking wonky lately. some days, i PB on my shake at breakfast, some days, i can eat 1/2 - 2/3 breakfast sandwich... (of which i shove the rest in my mouth cause the fucking head hunger) and then PB the rest of it up.

fuck.fuck.fuck.fuck... fuckity fuck

i mean seriously. my restriction is nothing right now and my discipline is nothing what so ever...
i mean really, if i had the discipline, i wouldnt fucking need a lap band, right?

and all of this would be fine and dandy if i was working out, but the entire weekend, what did i do? the Race for the Cure ... 5K ... due to how crowded it was, it took us just over an hour to complete.

sooooo, today's menu (so far):
breakfast:
sausage egg & cheese croissant from Jack In The Box (580 cals, thank you very much...)

snack(s):
baby ruth bar
some other chocolate bar (blocking out the name???)

lunch:
2 large chilis from Wendys
lots of crackers

snack:
3 snack sized mr. goodbars

WHAT.THE.FREAKING.FREAKY.FUCK!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK
FUCK
FUCK

fuck.

seriously.
fuck..

:(