think think think ...

i was thinking .. (did you smell the smoke??) maybe its time to stop thinking about "good" and "bad" food....

i realize that when i restrict myself (put myself on a diet), i want that restricted item SO much i could just scream... i am kinda doing low carb (until we run out of low carb/high fat food in the house)... soooo no bread/cookies/etc...

what did i just binge on? cookies...

right now i'm reading The Rules of "Normal" Eating: A Commonsense Approach for Dieters, Overeaters, Undereaters, Emotional Eaters, and Everyone in Between!

it talks about eating like a normal person - 'normal' people dont think of good/bad foods... the eat what they need, they satisfy their cravings (they have a great way to describe cravings...) eat what fuels your body...

*sigh* i really dont know where im going here, just typing out loud i guess. thats what i get for workign with chatty people who will not hush when im trying to have an insightful post ...

SO not feeling well ...

i think someone has given me the flu ... bastards!

i havent had the flu with my band, not looking forward to throwing up if i do eventually hurl ...

great.

a non-swollen morning.. 16s

this may be a dupe.. tried to post this AM, didnt show up..??

what im reading right now ...

will let you know how it is when i'm finished.

well fuck a duck... a confession of sorts...

i really think i need to be finished with Atkins.

really

it works really well for me and to be honest, i really like the fatty food ... i know ... bad bad bad bandster...

but i usually only last 2 weeks maximum and then for the next weeks/month i splurge promising that i will get back on track ... really... i will get back on track ...

after the cakes, cookies (looking to my right at the white chocolate mac. nut cookies that i've inhaled), M&Ms, etc...

WHAT
THE
FUCK

other than the fact that im not exercising as much as i can because my PS hasnt released me to full exercising and eating like a fucking pig

fuck
fuck
fuck

anyone in texas (dallas area) wanna come kick my ass... ??

it really is best

not to spill soup on your work keyboard...
uh oh

my annoying pooch/pouch whatever...

my 'pooch' or 'pouch' is circled ... it HAS gone down, but its still there ...

27 day pics 1/3

i am now really wishing i would have lost that 20 pounds that i wanted to lose before. i was having a really difficult time losing the weight (i was completely unfilled about 2 1/2 weeks before my PS due to being REALLY tight with the stress of the PS)

my pics will be up on my blog in about 5-10 minutes. i cant see much difference between the 20 & 27 day pics ... of course DH zoomed in more for the 27 day pics, so it looks a little skewed.

but you can see that 'pouch' of fat on my left. i was really hoping the pulling of the skin with the TT would take care of it completely. it lessened it, but didnt get rid of it.

27 day pics 2/3

27 day pics 3/3

mmmm .... mushies

yup, i got another fill.. hopefully, this will be THE ONE...

its the one time i allow myself to eat my fave mushy... stovetop stuffing... yummmmmmmmmmm

i KNOW its not great for me, but 2 days is not gunna kill me... and i do have my atkins shakes for fiber/protein...

so there, my guilty pleasure.. or 1 of them at least ;)

sooooo tired ...

it started with one fry...

then gelato, then peanut butter cup

guess today is my 'free day'

sent from my iPhone ;)

20 days post op compare - side

its been almost 3 weeks, here are my before PS and current pics...

Dr. P says that a lot of my 'trunkness' is still due to swelling, but even if it isnt im pleased as punch ...

20 days post op compare - front

20 days post op compare - back

hungry hungry hungry ...

i thought on atkins you LOST your appetite?

seems that not only have i not lost it, i've gained a new one ...

ate a whole burger for lunch, for my snack, i had a huge salad with 2.? ounces of steak and some cheese in it ...

W.T.F??????

wow

LOVE this quote from Glouchester on LBT...
The weight you have lost and the amount left to lose is just a number. It's this whole journey that is worth celebrating.

THANKS!!

mini rant??

yup, i posted this on LBT, but wanted it here too ...

i weigh 242 pounds ... there are LOTS of people on this board that start their WL journey where i am now ... and i've lost 160 pounds and still have 82 more to go... that's a ton of weight... (ha - and i wanted to call goal by my birthday in June ... double HA!)

i dunno if i am really the person to actually give the guidance... i just log my experiences (tell it like it is) for my journalling ... cause i cant remember shit...

i guess im just SO frustrated that i still look like a tree trunk... yes, the big huge gut is gone, but im still a very large girl.

it doesnt help matters that i refuse to tell my family (step mom) how much i've lost... she sent an email to another relative saying that i wont tell her but she thinks i've lost over 200 pounds .. damn. how big did she think i was??? i dont think i wanna know that answer.

why is it ...

that i have NO PROBLEM telling pretty much anyone and everyone that i have a lap band, but am hesitant on telling someone i got a tuck??

someone commented today that i've really lost a lot of weight, and i just smiled and said thank you and (i think) i just volunteered that i had lap band ... she said that just recently she's noticed ... i just said thank you ...

i mean really, im mostly an open person *really, pick your jaw up off the floor - i am ;)*, but i dont feel i need to broadcast the tuck to people here at work. i told my group, but that's pretty much it ... **shrugs** just thinking...